Not sure why I didn't post this when I actually WROTE it (considering it was actually relevant then), but that seems to be one of the things I do: write, but don't post.
___________________________
This is it. Nearly five months of rehearsal, and tonight we perform.
And I am nervous. Very nervous. Isn't it the performers who are supposed to be nervous?
I wonder if every director feels like this. So . . . responsible. But yet, incapable of doing more. The play is now out of my hands.
May it bless those who see it.
___________________________
I always planned to write more about the play. How it went, what it was like to direct, the things I learned and liked and hated. But, as so often happens, it was too soon, too raw, and then it was too late. The feelings slowly fading into that strange haze of past life.
[the lovely ladies of the cast, minus Olivia and Viola --
left to right: Maria, flutist, Fabiana, Valentina, and Curia]
Suffice it to say, it was one of the hardest things I've ever done, stretching me in ways I didn't know I could stretch. At the same time, it was one of the best things I've ever done, and the most enjoyable (easy to say, looking back, now that the stress/tension/terror is over). I'd never experienced anything like it before: sitting in the front row, watching something you created come to life without you. I've always been on the
acting side of theatre, participating in the art, but never experiencing it in its fullness. And it was . . . profound? It seems too arrogant of a word, but the meaning is about right. It was like watching a miracle take place. Things happened on that stage that I never would have believed possible. After all of the hard work, pressure, tension, and tears, it was like a taste of grace.
[working with Viola, a freshman with immense dedication]
And I was so proud of everyone.
My actors, shattering the limitations they set for themselves. Being bolder, and braver, and better, than they thought they could be. Than
I thought they could be.
Being a part of that was joy indeed.
[cast party to watch the filmed play -- clockwise from left: Valentina, Sebastian,
Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, Priest, Viola, me, Soldier, Malvolio]
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